I titled my blog "Infatuations" because that is one of the things that defines my life right now. And I think it defines a lot of people's lives -at least in certain aspects. I am living my life based on the infatuations I have, or to use a less strong word, my actions are driven by desire. My desire to compete in rodeo drives me through the chores of feeding my horses, cleaning up after them, hooking up the trailer, hauling to the arena to practice, and repeat. I think it is important to ask ourselves why we do something. Yes, the answer 'because I want to,' is valid. But why do we want to? The answer to that question is one that helps me get out of bed in the morning. Why do I want to write? Because I enjoy it. It is an outlet for me to express my thoughts in an abstract way. I love to write stories about other people because I can still fulfill the need to think about my problems, but in an indirect and less stressful way. Oh dear, my character is listless and unmotivated because she sees no point in fulfilling her degree requirements.. is there a solution to her problem? Sure. I give her a cup of delicious coffee on a rainy day. I put her in a comfy oversized sweater and sit her on a couch to stare out the window. Her spirits are lifted and so are mine. It really is as simple as that for me.
There are many more reasons for why I write, but that will have to wait for another time. I want to get back to infatuations. The kind of infatuations that we cannot control. Like for other people. Or the past. Or the future. These are things we do not have control over, yet can be absolutely lost over. Why? Well, that's a complicated answer. But I think it comes down to the make up of our brains and the values we hold at the time. And we must be careful with these infatuations. Being aware of them is half the battle.
What are your thoughts?
Nos vemos!
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