Being a Country Girl in a City World: 4 Ways to Stay True to You

As an English major, I am passionate about writing. I obsess over errors I find in texts, and I love reading. Books are my passion. But the balancing act between work, school, and internships is difficult. To top things off, rodeo is also a passion of mine, a passion that is time consuming and requires a lot of money. This article explores the balance between to very contrary loves and how a country girl is supposed to make it in a city world. 
"For me, I had the duality of two oppositional interests—rodeo and horses; books and writing. The former fills my waking hours, my evenings, and weekends with manure scooping, hay tossing, and horse riding. The latter draws up images of New York City..."


http://www.whiskeyriff.com/2016/06/13/being-a-country-girl-in-a-city-world-4-ways-to-stay-true-to-you/

Princess Sincerity

I am a dating expert. I said it, I am the date expert. I get women; I understand them. I consume them. And they love me. It doesn’t matter who you are; with a few of my tips women will be crawling all over you. 

The only problem I have is women, well, they get too attached.  My techniques are not meant for the one night stand. I make women fall hard in one night. If a committed, long term relationship is what you want, I can get it. But I cannot get you anything less.

My goal is not to find a relationship, nor is it to find a one night stand. I revel in the flirting, the small talk, and the attraction. Yet nothing more. My skill is in the art of the human mind. I understand the intricacies of its desires and complications of its functions. The fields of psychology and therapy suit me. But it is not enough for me. I strive to apply my knowledge, to test it in real life. I cannot sit across from someone and give them therapeutic advice. I like being out in the field. I call it research and women are my test subjects.

A dating expert typically is associated as being a player, a cheater. Essentially, the expert views dating as a game. I disagree. As an expert, I am a keen observer of the human psyche. I’m a charmer. I watch behavior patterns; I look for signs, clues to who is sitting across the bar. It may be a game for me: a psychological game. Psychological thrillers always interested me. My mom and I would sit in the living room reading mystery novel after mystery novel, soaking up the twists and turns, the surprises and the unanswered questions. I never admit this, but I enjoy curling up on the couch with a cup of coffee and a book to read on a snowy day. Women enjoy the thrill of being ‘picked up,’ flirted with, and lusted after. In itself is an art of mystery.

She’s stirring her drink quickly, almost agitated. I whisper something in her ear as I walk by, brushing my fingertips against her neck. She smiles and turns to look. But I was already immersed in the crowd. Now I’m the one that makes her happy and I am just out of her reach. Her eyes are scanning the place for me. She’s looking for something she never knew she wanted. I’m the mystery.

What did I say to her? Well, I could have said anything. It was in the way I caught her off guard, leaned in close sending chills all over her, and disappeared. The questions to be asked, “Who was that?” “Where did they go?” She must find out more.

“Your eyes sparkle like a thousand stars in the night sky.” That was charming.  But it was the truth laced with poetry. A romantic statement of an observation. Pretty words to whisper in her ear.

Prince Charming got his name because he gives delight and admiration. He is not called Prince Sincere. As for me, I mean what I say. I know it is exactly what they want to hear, but I am not lying. And that’s the difference. The honesty in my voice creates a security in her mind. And a desire for more. I believe one can be charming and sincere. And that’s important.

Sincerity.

I’m leaning against the bar when she sidles up next to me.

“Hello,” she says in a barely audible voice. She doesn’t look at me.

I’m observing her from the corner of my eye.

“Crown and coke?” she asked.

“Mm. Martini? Dry.” I asked.

She nods.

“You’re not what I expected.” She said.

“How do you know it’s me?”

She turns her body to me and leans an elbow on the bar and her drink on the napkin.

“Woman’s intuition,” she smiled.

“Are you disappointed?”

“Oddly, not at all,” her eyes flashed, zeroing in on my body.

“Good.” I said.

She thought she was one step ahead of me.

“It was the way you touched me, your lips against my ear and your fingers on my neck. And when you disappeared, I knew you couldn’t have gone far. The bar would be a safe bet. You’re alone, but you’re not waiting for anybody,” she said as though reading my mind. “Your body position is open, yet not welcoming. I walked by a few minutes before and I saw you shift your weight and I felt your eyes. That wasn’t the first time you’d noticed me. And you weren’t prepared for me to notice you yet.”

I shook my head. “Wow.” I said. “I’m impressed.”

“Want another one?” she motioned to my drink.

“Absolutely,” I said, watching her cautiously.

“I don’t usually drink martinis, but the happy hour makes them cheap enough to be worth it.”

“Mm,” I said. I still faced the dance floor and she leaned over the bar talking to the bartender.

I was intrigued.

“Any plans for later this evening?” She asked.

It was 11:30.

“I hadn’t planned that far ahead,” I said.

She examined me. “What? Did I throw off your game?” she smiled.

“No, no.” I smirked. “Not at all. I’m just impressed you found me so quickly.”

“Hmm,” she mumbled. “Well, after this drink do you want to get out of here?”

I looked into her eyes, searching them.

“I’d like that,” I smiled.

She put her hand on mine.

She fancies the idea that she outsmarted me. She thinks this was her idea.

She leads me out of the bar and to her car, proud of what she snatched up.

I have an unfair advantage; I have quite a bit of insight into what makes a woman, a woman. I know what makes her heart throb, what she loves and what she hates. I know her weaknesses.

Because I am one.

I am a woman.

Call me Princess Sincerity. 

She was Beautfiul

She was beautiful but sometimes she just got really sad. I think that’s what scared people away. Sometimes she will get into these moments where she’ll be so deep in thought and you can tell by the way she talks. She’ll say something without finishing the thought-no explanation. And pause & say something completely unrelated. Then she’ll respond to your story from earlier before smiling & saying ‘”sorry, I’ve got a lot on my mind.” What makes people uncomfortable though is when she goes quiet. “What’s wrong?” “Did I do something?” “Are you mad?”

I wonder how many things a human can think about at once. How many boxes can a person have open at once? I think she’s reached the ultimate-maximum-number-of-boxes-opened several times.  She’s smart but her brain over stretches itself resulting in mental, emotional, and physical exhaustion.

Most people don’t like it when she gets in these moods, but these are one of my favorite moments of her. This is when she is the most real and if you listen to her when she doesn’t feel like talking it is one of the most spectacular things. She’s not depressed; sometimes she gets caught in another universe. The universe of her mind. Sometimes it’s hard for her to escape and sometimes she doesn’t want to. But what causes her to get stuck in this universe is when people probe her for answers she doesn’t have. They ask what’s wrong and what’s on her mind and she’ll say there is a lot on her mind but nothing wrong and she definitely doesn’t want to talk about it. It’s her way of processing things. She’s half introvert and half extrovert and nobody can accept that. But I can more than accept it.

photo via compfight

Her mind is beautiful and terrifying.

I think its ok to be sad. It’s necessary. But she bears the burden of everything. She’s hypersensitive to other peoples thoughts and feelings.

This is one of the moments of her that I adore.  

Happy for No Reason

I like to explore different ways to approach things, different ways of thinking, and different perspectives on things. It's healthy to have an open mind. As a result, I find random yet interesting books or articles to read. This summer I stumbled across the concept of being happy for no reason. What does that mean? Well, look at your life right now. Are you, in your own terms, happy? (I say 'in your terms' because it's impossible to measure happiness. It is all relative and dependent on our own idea of it.) If so, why are you happy? Maybe it's because you got a raise at work, bought a new car, or your boyfriend bought you flowers. Would you be happy if those things were taken away? If the answer is no, then your happiness depends on materialistic things or other people. If you are happy for a reason, then that reason can be taken away.
So how do we find happiness without having a reason for it?

photo via compfight

Instead of saying we will be happy if we had that new car or had a relationship, we should be happy first, and then these things will fall into our laps. Eating healthy has proven to improve our mood. As does exercise. Both are natural ways to improve our bodies which in turn increases our happiness. This website explains the phenomena in terms of the book by Marci Shimoff:
http://www.learningstrategies.com/Happy/Home.asp